Friday, September 21, 2007

Kelly Clarkson urges Pope Benedict to stop stalking her

Original American Idol Winner, Kelly Clarkson has written an open letter to show business paper Vanity urging Pope Benedict XVI to cease his constant following of her.
The letter reads as follows:

Dear Pope Benedict XVI,

Please desist from following me. You are a grown man and father, with another child on the way with Paris Hilton.

You are, like me, a famous person who has responsibilities to your fans and general public.
Don’t you feel ashamed? Leave me alone and stop calling me, following me and sending me flowers.

We could never be. Why can’t you get that through your thick skull.

Yours hatefully,

Kelly Clarkson
Chubby Singer/ Humanitarian”

The Pontiff has so far made no comment but sources reveal that a pope-mobile matching the description of Benedict’s has been spotted parked across the road from Miss Clarkson’s Hollywood home.


Kat said...

If Kelly is called chubby, no wonder there's so many anorexic hollywood stars.

Jesus Budda said...

Kelly Clarkson, at the time this story was written, was 42 stone in wright. She was been rolled around on stage by Oompa Loompas and was transposted from one venue to another by fork lift.

Just to clarify.

Now she is down to 26 stone and is looking much fitter.

She can now see her feet.
Which is a good thing, I'm sure you'll agree.

Jesus Budda